Dennis, good question. The answer is a tough one. If your children are
young and cannot participate then it would be selfish for you to race every
weekend. If your wife does not support your passion at all, and you feel
compelled to pursue it regardless, then there's trouble brewing in your
marriage. I think a solution in that case would be to attempt to get your
wife involved, perhaps riding along with you or getting her through one of
the autocross schools so that she has an understanding in what attracts you
to this sport. I think it is unfair for a wife not to allow her husband to
engage in a passion such as ours. I am divorced, but I made it very clear
from the beginning that I would pursue my passions diligently if we were
to get married. To me, it was a condition that she expected, but did not
honor. I can't blame autox specifically for my divorce, but if your loved
ones do not participate at all in your passion, then I believe autox will
have a detrimental impact on your marriage. Get them to participate if you
can......
My present girlfriend has a passion for equestrian horse riding. Iv'e had
to learn to jump a horse in order to get her to go to the races. Iv'e
offered her to drive the Ralt, but she won't have it at the moment. My 16
year old daughter can't get involved on account of her swim program which
conflicts with most autox events. I think you said it right in that you
need to find a balance in your activities. If you over-autox, then make
sure you participate and support your wife's passions and childrens
activities equally.
The ideal situation would be to have a wife and family who support what you
are doing and have the money and time to participate in it themselves.
There are some autox families like this, but few.
Unfortunately, I think the divorce is more common......
Mike
----------
> From: Dennis & Sherry Armstrong <Miata@pacbell.net>
> To: ba-autox <ba-autox@autox.team.net>
> Subject: A question of balance
> Date: Monday, May 29, 2000 9:33 AM
>
> Greetings
> I have a question for all of you. How do you balance you
> family life with autocrossing? Or are most of you single,
> divorced & without children?
>
> My wife has been getting angry at me for spending so
> much time autocrossing. This is especially bad because
> I work nights during the week. How do all of you handle
> this situation? Or am I the only guy who is Married with
> Children?
>
> Dennis Armstrong
>
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