Dear confused STS driver,
Back when we provided Dennis with some tires, life was a lot simpler. There
were street tires and then there were "R" tires. Good boys like Dennis were
rewarded with "R" tires to go play with the big boys. The arbitrary
treadwear ratings on the tires for all of these "street tire" classes has
made things very difficult for us here at the North pole (yes, pay no
attention to the posts from that traitor Rudolf; he is attempting to branch
off on his own and compete with us using cheaper labor.)
But don't worry, we have a perfect solution for you. We have come up with
our own brand of tires, Santa's Custom Outer Treadwear Tires (SCOTT). We
can take any "R" tire and rebrand it with any treadwear you want. I have
checked my list twice and I know you have been good this year (except for
that incident on Halloween night of course.) I have a set of Kumho V710's
with treadwear of 140 with your name on them.
--Santa
>
> I understand that my friend Dennis got tires for
> Christmas several years ago. I would like to request
> a set of Falkens, no wait... Hankooks! I definitely
> want Hankooks! Or, maybe BFG T/A KDs... How about
> Hoosiers with a 140 treadwear rating?
>
> Confused STS Driver...
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