Scott, Scott,,, Sigh... You wouldn't try to speed up an assembly process of
one person five times by beating the guy and hoping he could work five times
faster would you? Of course not. Well perhaps you would try it at first. But
after it failed you would realise that your problem is manpower not
motivation. Thus the true solution would be hiring an army of Santa Claus
twins each equipped with the traditional sled and eight normal-sized
reindeer. This might have presented some logistical problems in the past
requiring the use of arcane arts. Today however, modern technology offers
the much simpler solution of cloning.
In any event, even if you could increase Santas thermal efficiency, I doubt
it would serve. I think St. Nick's chances of surviving any attempt to come
shooting over the North Pole at Mach 3, red hot and pointed at Washington,
are unlikely to be improved by any amount of nomex or ceramic tiles. An
effective anti-missile ECM package would be much more useful. ;^)
Cheers,
Mark Hooper
1972 TR6 (and it's hot red too)
-----Original Message-----
From: Scott A. Roberts [mailto:herald1200@comcast.net]
Sent: Monday, December 16, 2002 9:54 PM
To: Don Spence; triumphs@autox.team.net
Subject: Re: SANTA CLAUS: AN ENGINEER9S PERSPECTIVE No LBC as Lucas,
Dunlop etc just couldn't cut it
Let's have some fun. Why not change the parameters of the postulate: Hence,
Santa only delivers to those children who do not follow particular religions
which do not sponsor belief in him.- This would include some Christian sects
as well as the aforementioned. Also, he does deliver to non-Christian
children, when their parents allow this belief. There would probably be some
disparity in figures.
2. Rather than loading the sleigh entirely at one point, Santa prepositions
filled sleighs at certain points around the world, allowing the swapping out
of empty sleighs for full ones as he came past the prepositioning points. It
has never been stated with clarity that Santa has only one sleigh to work
with.
3. Include in the figuring a set amount of coal, the traditional reward for
the non-good children; This would include extra mass and weight, however, it
could be offset by additional prepositioning points as stated above.
4. Santa's suit is red Nomex, and the sleigh is coated with ceramic tiles,
sold by NASA to help raise funds for further operations.
5. Rudolph is actually a warp capable thrust unit replicated to look like a
reindeer, so as not to spook the other reindeer.
6. The "Sleigh" is actually just Santa's nickname for his trusty red and
gold, ceramic tiled '60 TR3
The new postulate would be, given these parameters, could Santa NOW
accomplish the mission previously proven highly improbable?
The short answer: NO! Despite the best planning and equipment possible, the
red and gold, ceramic tiled 1960 TR3 has a minor oil leak, the "Rudolph" was
manufactured by Lucas, and Vicky Brit is backordered on the one and only
part needed to make the TR3 run right. Therefore, Santa will have to call
every parent who's child was on his lists, and advise them of the needed
deliveries. Given the internet, there is about a 63.2% chance of success
this way, based on the assumption everyone has a working ISP.
Scott
De-famed Engineer(of model railroads)
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