[Healeys] Where have all the Friday Funnies Gone?

[Carlos Cruz]

Say it ain't so Lucy...
   
  It's 3:15 PST so odds are all the old farts on the east coast are probably asleep by now.  I don't think I've seen one Friday Funny on the list today.  I can't believe it.  The one day a week I look forward to having something more than carpeting tires, figuring out what to do with my clutch or changing my car's positive attitude to negative.  So let me see if I can bring a smile to your face before your head hits the pillow...
   
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  I was driving my Healey last night on the back roads in the foothills of the Cascades.  There wasn't a soul around when suddenly the sky clouded above my head and a booming voice, said, 'Because you have tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.'

I pulled over immediately and said, 'Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive my Healey over anytime I want.'

  The voice said, 'Your request is materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking: the supports required reaching the bottom of the Pacific and the concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help mankind.'  

I got back in the car and drove for about 20 more miles then pulled over again.  I looked up to the sky and said, 'Lord, I wish that I and all men could understand women. I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she really means when she says nothing's wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy.'

The voice said back to me, 'You want two lanes or four on that bridge?'

   
  Happy Friday Guys!
  Cheers,
  Carlos Cruz