[Fot] Jeff Gordon fires entire pit crew!

[Jim Gray]

In this morning's  news, Jeff
Gordon fires entire pit crew! 

 

This announcement followed
Gordon's  decision to take
advantage of President Obama's
proposal to employ Harlem
youngsters. 

 

The decision to hire them was
brought about by a recent
documentary on how unemployed
youths from Harlem  were able
to remove a set of wheels in
less than 6 seconds without
proper  equipment, whereas
Gordon's existing crew could
only do it in 8 seconds with
thousands of dollars worth of
high tech  equipment. 

 

It was thought to be an
excellent  and bold move by
Gordon's management team as
most races are won or lost in
the  pits. 

 

At the crew's first practice
session, not only was the
inexperienced crew able to
change all 4 wheels in  under
6 seconds, but within 12
seconds they had changed the
paint scheme,  altered the VIN
number, and sold the car to
Dale Jr. for 10 cases of Bud,
a  bag of weed and some photos
of Jeff Gordon's wife in the
shower.