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Nothing about Triumphs, but a jab against MGBs:
<<
What Your Car Says About You:
Acura Integra- I have always wanted to own the Buick of sports cars.
Acura Legend- I'm too bland for German cars.
Acura NSX- I am impotent.
Audi 90- I enjoy putting out engine fires.
Buick Park Avenue- I am older than 34 of the 50 states.
Cadillac Eldorado- I am a very good Mary Kay salesman.
Cadillac Seville- I am a pimp.
Chevrolet Camaro- I enjoy beating up people.
Chevrolet Chevette- I like seeing people's reactions when I tell them I
have a 'Vette.
Chevrolet Corvette- I'm in a mid-life crisis.
Chevrolet El Camino- I am leading a militia to overthrow the government.
Chrysler Cordoba- I dig the rich Corinthian leather.
Datsun 280Z- I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well.
Dodge Dart-I teach third grade special education and I voted for
Eisenhower.
Dodge Daytona- I delivered pizza for four years to get this car.
Ford Escort - I'm a red-headed nanny.
Ford Fairmont- (See Dodge Dart)
Ford Mustang- I slow down to 85 in school zones.
Ford Crown Victoria- I enjoy having people slow to 55mph & change lanes
when I pull up behind them.
Geo Storm- I will start the 11th grade in the Fall.
Geo Tracker- I will start the 12th grade in the Fall.
Honda del Sol- I have always said, half a convertible is better than no
convertible at all.
Honda Civic- I have just graduated and have no credit.
Honda Accord- I lack any originality and am basically a lemming.
Infiniti Q45- I am a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending.
Isuzu Impulse-I do not give a rip about J.D. Power or his reports.
Jaguar XJ6-I am so rich I will pay 60K for a car that is in the shop
280 days per year.
Kia Sephia- I learned nothing from the failure of Diahatsu Corp.
Lincoln Town Car- I live for bingo and covered dish suppers.
Mercury Grand Marquis- (See above)
Mercedes 500SL- I will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph.
Mercedes 560SEL- I have a daughter named Bitsy and a son named Cole.
Mazda Miata- I do not fear being decapitated by an 18-wheeler.
MGB- I am dating a mechanic.
Mitsubishi Diamante- I don't know what it means either.
Nissan 300ZX- I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings.
Oldsmobile Cutlass- I just stole this car and I'm going to make a....
Peugeot 505 Diesel- I am on the EPA's Ten Most Wanted List.
Plymouth Neon- I sincerely enjoy doing the Macarena.
Pontiac Grand AM (pre 92 models)- I keep two cases of AquaNet in the
backseat, just in case someone in a Trans AM pulls up beside me.
Pontiac Trans AM- I am a redneck who thinks a Trans AM is a sportscar.
Porsche 944- I am dating big haired women that otherwise would be
inaccessible to me.
Rolls Royce Silver Shadow- I think Pat Buchannon is a tad bit too
liberal.
Saturn SC2- (See Honda Civic)
Subaru Legacy- I have always wanted a Japanese car even more.
Toyota Camry- I am still in the closet.
Volkswagon Beetle- I still watch Partridge Family reruns.
Volkswagon Cabriolet- I am out of the closet.
Volkswagon Microbus- I am tripping right now.
Volvo 740 Wagon- I am frightened of my wife.
>>
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Content-Disposition: inline
Return-path: DeRtist@aol.com
From: DeRtist@aol.com
Full-name: DeRtist
Date: Sun, 18 Apr 1999 17:06:32 EDT
Subject: FROM YOUR WIFE....WHAT YOUR CAR SAYS ABOUT YOU
To: Gbouff1@aol.com
What Your Car Says About You:
Acura Integra- I have always wanted to own the Buick of sports cars.
Acura Legend- I'm too bland for German cars.
Acura NSX- I am impotent.
Audi 90- I enjoy putting out engine fires.
Buick Park Avenue- I am older than 34 of the 50 states.
Cadillac Eldorado- I am a very good Mary Kay salesman.
Cadillac Seville- I am a pimp.
Chevrolet Camaro- I enjoy beating up people.
Chevrolet Chevette- I like seeing people's reactions when I tell them I
have a 'Vette.
Chevrolet Corvette- I'm in a mid-life crisis.
Chevrolet El Camino- I am leading a militia to overthrow the government.
Chrysler Cordoba- I dig the rich Corinthian leather.
Datsun 280Z- I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well.
Dodge Dart-I teach third grade special education and I voted for
Eisenhower.
Dodge Daytona- I delivered pizza for four years to get this car.
Ford Escort - I'm a red-headed nanny.
Ford Fairmont- (See Dodge Dart)
Ford Mustang- I slow down to 85 in school zones.
Ford Crown Victoria- I enjoy having people slow to 55mph & change lanes
when I pull up behind them.
Geo Storm- I will start the 11th grade in the Fall.
Geo Tracker- I will start the 12th grade in the Fall.
Honda del Sol- I have always said, half a convertible is better than no
convertible at all.
Honda Civic- I have just graduated and have no credit.
Honda Accord- I lack any originality and am basically a lemming.
Infiniti Q45- I am a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending.
Isuzu Impulse-I do not give a rip about J.D. Power or his reports.
Jaguar XJ6-I am so rich I will pay 60K for a car that is in the shop
280 days per year.
Kia Sephia- I learned nothing from the failure of Diahatsu Corp.
Lincoln Town Car- I live for bingo and covered dish suppers.
Mercury Grand Marquis- (See above)
Mercedes 500SL- I will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph.
Mercedes 560SEL- I have a daughter named Bitsy and a son named Cole.
Mazda Miata- I do not fear being decapitated by an 18-wheeler.
MGB- I am dating a mechanic.
Mitsubishi Diamante- I don't know what it means either.
Nissan 300ZX- I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings.
Oldsmobile Cutlass- I just stole this car and I'm going to make a....
Peugeot 505 Diesel- I am on the EPA's Ten Most Wanted List.
Plymouth Neon- I sincerely enjoy doing the Macarena.
Pontiac Grand AM (pre 92 models)- I keep two cases of AquaNet in the
backseat, just in case someone in a Trans AM pulls up beside me.
Pontiac Trans AM- I am a redneck who thinks a Trans AM is a sportscar.
Porsche 944- I am dating big haired women that otherwise would be
inaccessible to me.
Rolls Royce Silver Shadow- I think Pat Buchannon is a tad bit too
liberal.
Saturn SC2- (See Honda Civic)
Subaru Legacy- I have always wanted a Japanese car even more.
Toyota Camry- I am still in the closet.
Volkswagon Beetle- I still watch Partridge Family reruns.
Volkswagon Cabriolet- I am out of the closet.
Volkswagon Microbus- I am tripping right now.
Volvo 740 Wagon- I am frightened of my wife.
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