I read three whole pages of this book by a Mr. Kornfield, some American
Buddhist monk or something. This is a Marin thing, probably. I ordered it
through Working Assetts several weeks back, in one of those momentary fits
where you read the description on the phone bill (Working Assets is a phone
company that tries to spiritually enlighten its customers, which took a whole
lot of mind expanding on my own part to try to digest), and think, "Ah! This
is the book for me!" And then it arrived, and I thought, "WHY did I order
this?" It has a pretty cover, though.
Well, I don't read many books on spirituality. The topic intrigues me, but
only in the back of my mind, but when I do delve into it a bit more I always
try to connect it to autocross. And only autocross. Well, other things, too,
but only autocross has given me so much joy and so much pain. So, I got three
pages through this book, and immediately made a connection.
The whole theme of this book is what happens to people after they reach
"enlightment," or after they have that "awakening." Surely, you must know what
I'm talking about. Doesn't this happen to you all the time? You meditate for
four hours, consuming nothing but green tea and rice cakes, chanting your
mantra, and now everything connects, and you're filled with that warm inner
glow?
Okay, how about after you nail that killer run, and you think, "That's IT! I
now know everything about autocross!"
So you've had that "autocross awakening." Everything connects. You get the
pats on the back, the satisfaction that you are "one" with your car, a chosen
one, someone really, really special because you can drive your car so fast
through traffic cones. And then what? The anti-climax. The depression. The
fear that you may never have that run again. And then, you go to your next
autocross, spin out three times, and start wondering if you ever knew what you
were doing to begin with. Panic sets in.
Or, as Mr. Kornfield put it, you've found the ecstasy, and now your laundry
beckons. It's back to the real world for you.
I haven't gotten farther than those three pages, because I promptly fell
asleep. And I DO have tons of laundry to do, and it is absolutely stressing me
out and I'm having a hard time coping.
But I promise to read more, and I'll let you know what I find out, if I can
make any more connections. But allow me to extrapolate for one instance:
nothing lasts, not happiness, not sadness, that killer run will last you xx.x
seconds, and not a tenth more, or less, so trying to attach yourself to that
xx.x seconds is about as useful as attaching yourself to WIND.
Katie K.
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