Good Luck Katie... show them the stuff you are made of...and have a lot of
fun doing it.
Butch
> [Original Message]
> From: Kelly, Katie <kkelly@spss.com>
> To: <ba-autox@autox.team.net>
> Date: 10/8/01 1:10:33 PM
> Subject: FINDING BALANCE
>
> Hello all:
>
> Well, after two months of making payments and fantasizing, I have
> brought home my cheaper version of a Honda S2000. It's a Cannondale
> R600, black, so it matches perfectly little Lucy.
>
> I still haven't thought of a name yet.
>
> My first triathlon is this Sunday in Sacramento. What I am most thankful
> for is that you only have to stop once, and thank God most roads aren't
> made of hardwood. You should have seen me struggling in the bike shop
> trying to figure out those clipless pedals. I've gone out on a few short
> rides and have not fallen yet, but in all stopping situations I had
> ample time to plan stopping in advance.
>
> People on this list talk about all the time about their first
> autocrossing experiences, and what it is that keeps them coming back.
> Many people say what keeps them coming back isn't victory, but the
> personal challenges.
>
> Then there's a general feeling among some that if it's too hard, people
> give up in frustration.
>
> I think the latter might be true, for the same reason that not a lot of
> people try marathons, triathlons, rock climbing, or whatever. It's the
> challenge itself that draws people. If it were too easy, no one would do
> it, because everyone COULD do it.
>
> There is no way I'm going to win this triathlon. I know pretty well what
> my average mile pace is in running for example, and I know that there
> are many runners faster than I am. Maybe, with more experience and
> practice, I'll get closer, but there are people with much more aerobic
> capacity, much more talent, and much greater pain tolerance than I, and
> I know that I can't even compare myself to them, probably ever.
>
> Yet, what is it about these events that draw thousands of people, most
> of whom have no chance in winning? If you can hold an 8 minute mile
> pace, and you know the winner will probably hold six minute miles (is
> that even possible?), do you think, "Well, maybe THIS time I'll do it?"
>
> Probably not. Maybe you try to hold 7:55s. The idea of success becomes
> entirely personal. And that's what excites me. I confess that in
> autocrossing, I get too caught up in the competition. Part of it is just
> part of the game. The only way to gauge your performance is to compare
> yourself to others. But then there comes a time when you can go too far.
> Someone beats you who normally doesn't, and you get depressed about it.
> There is such a fine line between knowing that you can win, and finding
> the strength to let yourself do it, and beating yourself up so much that
> you CAN'T win.
>
> Sometimes, I also have a hard time being around autocrossers. I work
> really hard not to become too consumed, to find the positives, and yet
> there's always that SOMEONE who says, "Oh, you were a second and a half
> behind Andy McKee? Ouch."
>
> They missed the part when I said I was happy about that. Sometimes, they
> can't understand why I would be happy about that, because to be happy
> with LOSING, as they see it, means I'm content with being a loser. I
> don't see it that way at all. I'm trying to learn how to drive better,
> and that's a process, and I'm just slowly trying to put it all together,
> and I'm trying to keep my expectations realistic. There are things I do
> well, and things I can improve, and every event is a chance to work on
> that. But as of late, the challenge for me comes not just in driving,
> but in finding the inner-know-how to just let that stuff roll off of me
> which is quite prevalent in autocrossing. My ability to do roll with the
> punches has deteriorated over the years. Or maybe it would be better to
> say my ability to roll with the punches has become more painfully
> EXPOSED.
>
> Look at all the stuff you can learn by autocrossing!
>
> But anyway, I don't care. I love my new bike. So, it's time to engage in
> an equally addictive activity, something completely new and exciting, to
> give myself some balance. Something else I really admired about E.J. was
> that from her, I learned it really never is too late to have a happy
> childhood. So, this time, I get to swim and bike and run, and do all the
> things I used to do in the summer when I was a kid with too much energy
> and life was so much fun.
>
> And then, I'll come to the next autocross, just to have some balance.
>
> Wish me luck!
>
> Katie Kelly
--- butchgarcia@earthlink.net
|