Just for Fun !!!!
Enjoy..... ZAG
There Ain't No Chickens In There !!
by Rod Aydee
I knew by the look on my wife's face that it could only be one of two people
on the phone. Either it was my Boss, who as usual calls to screw up my
weekend, or Gasser Bill Evans. Now as far as which one is less liked by my
wife, it probably would be Gasser. The way she sees it, he helps me deplete
the checking account and Henry is seen as the conduit through which I can
replenish it.
"Helloooo........"
"Hey Rod... It's Gasser, what ya doin right this minute? I got a great lead
on that Walton 1500RS I was tellin' ya about last week, get over here so we
can go check it out!"
" Ahh Well..." the look on Twyla's face was like ' move an inch away from the
paint brush and you won't need to wash up, the funeral director will handle
it' ...." I'm kinda busy right now Gasser...., ah me and THE WIFE is paintin'
the kitchen... (LOUDER) Which You Know I Been Promising Her Ever Since I Got
Those Carb Kits from England." Trying to make Twyla understand I correctly
understood the look and the order of importance painting had in her day.
"Well, Damn, I hate to run all the way out there, find it and not be able to
get it on the trailer.... Man.... Can't your old lady handle that ????????"
whined Gasser.
"Naw, I gotta get this done. I just wouldn't be right to leave it all up to
herrrrrr......."
Now I ain't never understood women. I don't pretend I ever will, but what
happened next is beyond my comprehension. Twyla looks at me and says "Honey,
I can finish this up. You've really done the biggest part." I stood there
with my mouth hanging open, Gasser mumbling something as the phone dangled
from my finger tips. Three things flashed through my mind. 1). She was
succumbing to paint fumes, 2). The VISA bill is due in today's mail, or 3).
My sister in law was gonna drop her kids off for us to watch for the next 10
days as she runs off to Vegas for the third matrimonial ceremony and I'm
gonna miss the Pocono race.
Quickly I covered up the phone and said " Gee Baby, He really does need my
help, I mean it really IS IMPORTANT, and I won't spend any money. ( Well...
other than a stop at the Saddle Club). Would You REALLLLLY Mind ????"
..........My turn to whine.
In that coy little voice she finds at times like this she says " No, it's
OK.... besides Tawna might stop by." I knew it, there are only three things
that can get me outta that kinda jamb and usually it's Tawna. Now Tawna is a
whole story to her self, which we don't have time for, let's suffice to say
she doesn't appreciate a 30 year old LBC as you or I might.
" GASSER ????.... Man you won't believe what a Wonderful Wife I have... she
said I can go ... and besides my Favorite Sister in Law might stop by to
visit US later..." (Playing it Up Big and she knew it. The scrunched up
eyebrows she threw at me said it all. Hey, I know my place.)
I was on Gasser's door in ten minutes. We had the trailer on the hitch in 5.
Gasser's truck is reliable. It really is. It's just an embarrassment to ride
in. I have often thought that whenever we would show up at a place to drag
away an old car, people just naturally felt sorry for him. I mean sometimes
they would literally give him whatever we went after afraid we might have to
find life in it to make it home. We pulled out, went 50 feet and made the
prerequisite stop to throw some coat hanger wire on the exhaust.
"Man I am telling you this just might be it !" Gasser wheezed as we jumped
back into the truck. " Old Man Farley said he was in there about 10 years ago
and it was all there. The over riders, the badge bar, even the 'Trilites was
on it. I just hope the people have an affection for cash."
"Old Man Farley is usually full of crap. Remember the wild goose chase he
sent us on for that Osberg MK3. Damn thing turned out to be just a rusted out
ol' chevy. Not worth the gas to haul it to the recycler." I spit back at him.
Gasser and I have been on a few of these and they all haven't turn out as
expected. In fact I can't remember one that did... well except for the
Harrington and that's another story too.
"No man, his kid was with him. He knows what they are, and he said it was
perfect." Well, I decided to just wait and see. We followed the kids
scratched on the back of a lunch sack directions which were surprisingly
good. So I began to feel like maybe we would find the 'Holy Grail' and there
would be a Walton 1500RS in that barn.
Now I don't know how well you know the Walton 1500RS. But, in 1960 they came
on the European rally and race scene like Hitler through Belgium. They won
every 1.5 liter class event they entered up including Le Mans. Where the
three cars entered finished 14, 15, and 17th overall, finishing ahead of many
of the bigger cars. The 15th place car won the Index of Thermal Performance
Trophy. The car traveled 2112 miles at an average speed of about 88 mph.
Using a minuscule 78 gallons of petrol. WOW !
When Walton designed the original car he had no intention of racing it. It
was intended to be just another LBC to get about in... except at the last
minute he had a dream. In this dream he imagined a rotary slide valve system
that would allow the valves maximum lift at high rpms and shorter lift at
lower rpms. The effect would be higher torque at lower revs and bigger
horsepower at higher revs. Now I have only seen this in pictures, but it was
a killer. He became a maniac in the tool and die shop. In less than three
weeks they were producing the Walton 1500RS engines one at a time under his
Eagle Eye.
Prescott Walton was a suspicious man and he carefully guarded all of his
inventions. This time making sure the patent office issued his number before
releasing any of the cars. Walton was the first person to test the car. Upon
returning to the shop he immediately set about proving his funny looking
little car was all he knew it was. This is were Ian Manx became involved.
Since Manx was the reigning European rally champion, Walton was hot to get
him in the car. Walton went to the trouble of entering the car in the Alpine
Rallye without a designated driver. Stories of the cars unique engine blazed
through the Rallye circuit. He spread rumors that this driver and that driver
were going to pilot the car. The only name he intentionally left out was
Manx. Egos like engines want to rev. Manx was no different. He had heard
about the new engine design and if HE was the one to get it first, he would
have a heads up on everyone else. Word was sent to Walton that Manx might be
interested in driving the car in the pre-rallye short distance timed runs
scheduled for two days before the event. At the appointed time the funny
little car with the odd exhaust bite was rolled into the timing line. Manx
mysteriously appeared as if out of thin air, jumped in the car and ran the
fastest time of the day not only for 1.5 liter and under, but the 2.0 liter
class as well. Needless to say everyone was a buzz.
So what does this have to do with chickens, right? Well the next time we
visit, I'll clear that up along with how Gasser once again fell into it all.
|