[Healeys] FW: Tools (the rest)

Alan Seigrist healey.nut at gmail.com
Fri Feb 6 19:46:36 MST 2009


This is how I have used this tool successfully in the past:

THOR HAMMER:  When completing a ground up restoration on an Austin Healey
3000, use this special tool to swing very hard at knock offs to get the
wheels on so you can drive your car for the first time in 6 months.  If you
are in California during the summer, also be sure to be doing this work
wearing sandals.  Upon successfully misstriking the knock off, be sure to
plunge copper end of hammer into big toe with full force, breaking the toe
and causing substantial amounts of bleeding.  Striking the toe in this
manner will make driving the car impossible, not to mention walking for for
about a week.


Alan

'52 A90
'53 BN1
'64 BJ8


On Sat, Feb 7, 2009 at 7:27 AM, Eric (Rick) Wilkins <e-wilkins at cox.net>wrote:

> I went online and found the rest:
>
> EIGHT-FOOT LONG 2 X 4: Used for levering a car upward off a hydraulic
> jack handle.
> TWEEZERS: A tool for removing wood splinters.
> E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR: A tool ten times harder than any
> known drill bit that snaps off in bolt holes you couldn't use anyway.
>  TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST: A tool for testing the tensile strength of
> everything you forgot to disconnect.
> 1/2" x 16-INCH SCREWDRIVER: A large pry bar that inexplicably has an
> accurately machined screwdriver tip on the end opposite the handle.
>  PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the lids of old-style
> paper-and-tin oil cans and splash oil on your shirt; but can also be
> used,as the name implies, to strip out Phillips screw heads.
> AIR COMPRESSOR: A machine that takes energy produced in a coal-
> burning power station 200 miles away and transforms it into
> compressed air that travels by hose to a pneumatic impact wrench that
> grips rusty bolts last over-tightened 50 years ago by someone at Ford
> and neatly rounds off their heads.
> PRY BAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or
> bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50" part.
> HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays
> is used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts
> not far from the object we are trying to hit.


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