I told my son that if he willfully broke the law during his first
"probationary" period of one year that he would be back on the bus awaiting
the next year. He knew that I made no hollow threats, especially after I sent
away to our state capital to be designated as a driving instructor, spent
Saturday after Saturday with a chalkboard and countless hours of seat time
teaching him how to drive. I also made him wait until he was 17 to get his
license as I didn't see the maturity that I needed to turn him loose. He paid
for half of his car and ALL of his insurance. I also told him how
uncomfortable it would be as a senior getting on the bus and having all the
freshman elbowing each other and asking quietly, "why is he so old?". He
never had a citation. My experience is to make it painful enough financially
and emotionally so that a repeat doesn't happen. If that means walking to
school, bumming rides, or a bus then that is what really gets their attention.
Since the time wasn't pre-established you get to be the judge on when the real
learning has happened. This does not mean caving in and hauling her wherever
a whim would lead, there is no pain in that-except for you.
It sounds like you are a great Dad.
Ed Fisher
Dallas
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