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FW: Driving

To: triumph owners digest <triumphs@Autox.Team.Net>, Cathie Puryear <mccp@acpub.duke.edu>, Carlton Cormier <AQPW35A@prodigy.com>, Ellen Barron <ebarron@mscc.cc.ar.us>
Subject: FW: Driving
From: "Smith, Brian" <brian_s@deq.state.la.us>
Date: Thu, 22 Jan 1998 10:19:52 -0600
Brian H. Smith
Lake Charles , LA
1959 TR3
1972 Spitfire IV
1977 TR7

> ----------
> 
> For those of you who are on the road.........
>  
>  HOW TO IDENTIFY WHERE A DRIVER IS FROM:
>  
> One hand on wheel, one hand on horn:  New York
> 
> 
> One hand on wheel, one finger out window:  Chicago
>   
> 
> One hand on wheel, one hand on newspaper, foot solidly on accelerator:
> Boston
> 
>   
> One hand on wheel, one hand cradling cell phone, brick on accelerator:
> California; with gun in lap:  L.A.
>  
> 
> Both hands on wheel, eyes shut, both feet on brake, quivering in
> terror:  Ohio, but driving in California.
> 
> 
> Both hands in air, gesturing, both feet on accelerator, head turned to
> talk to someone in back seat:  Italy
> 
>  
> One hand on latte, one knee on wheel, one hand cradling cell phone,
> foot on brake, mind on game:    Seattle
> 
>  
> One hand on wheel, one hand on hunting rifle, alternating between both
> feet being on the accelerator and both on the brake, throwing a
> McDonalds bag out the window:  Texas city male
> 
> 
> One hand on wheel, one hand hanging out the window, keeping speed
> steadily at 70mph, driving down the center of the road unless coming
> around a blind curve, in which case they are on the left side of the
> road:  Texas country male
> 
> 
> One hand constantly refocusing the rear-view mirror to show different
> angles of the BIG hair, one hand going between mousse,brush, and
> rat-tail to keep the helmet hair going, both feet on the accelerator,
> poodle steering the car, chrome .38 revolver with mother of pearl
> inlaid handle in the glove compartment:  Texas female
> 
> 
> Both hands on steering wheel in a relaxed posture, eyes constantly
> checking the rear-view mirror to watch for visible emissions from
> their own or another's car:  Colorado 
> 
> 
> One hand on steering wheel,  yelling obscenities, the other hand
> waving gun out the window and firing repeatedly, keeping a careful eye
> out for landmarks along the way so as to be able to come back and pick
> up any bullets that didn't hit other motorists so as not  to litter:
> Colorado resident on spotting a car with Texas plate.
> 
> 
> Four wheel drive pickup truck, shotgun mounted in rear window, beer
> cans on floor, squirrel tails attached to antenna:  West Virginia
> male. 
>  
> 
> Junker, driven by someone who previously had a nice car and who is now
> wearing a barrel:  Las Vegas
> 
> 
> Two hands gripping wheel, blue hair barely visible above window level,
> driving 35 on the interstate in the left lane with the left blinker
> on:  Florida.
> 
> 
> Drives in the left hand lane at irregular speeds, refusing to move
> over, loops to the left before making a right hand turn:  Pennsylvania
> 
> 
> Drives slouched in seat with one arm bracing steering wheel in locked
> position, other arm either resting on open window or on stick shift,
> always has a baseball cap on (worn in various directions), never
> drives alone, bass too loud to hear lyrics of tapes permanently in
> tape deck, tinted windows, with hand gun in glove compartment:
> Philadelphia male
> 
> 
> Curly, teased, gelled big hair, driving a beat-up old chevrolet,
> camaro, trans am, or mustang, cawfee in one hand, the other hand glued
> to the radio flipping stations, head turned to yell at passengers,
> while cutting in front of everybody:  New Jersey female
> 
> 
> Continually runs yellow/RED lights doing 60 mph, singing along to
> radio if they can find a decent station, thinks everybody else drives
> too slow and needs to be pushed along (no matter what the weather
> conditions), curses when they have to stop for a red light or avoids
> red light altogether by either cutting across 2 lanes to make a right
> or simply makes a U-turn, always in a hurry, and doesn't know the
> meaning of YIELD:  Delaware
> 
> 
> Drive safely!
> 
> 
> 
> 

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