Keith's VW ride reminded me of the dark green mid 50s Beetle that my
neighbor/coworker drove. I caught a ride home with him ONCE.... guy drove
like a batouttahell and yanked back on the Ebrake yelling "Whoa Horse, Whoa!"
in a cheesy impression of Yosemite Sam... Scary ride, scary guy....
The memory is one of the ultra vivid deja vu variety that I witness
every so often when I see a 2 car garage.....
Now, I can see that his brake pedal is hard as a rock, way up high,
and I explain maybe when we get to my house we can check out the the brakes
to see if he has a frozen master cyl or just a stuck pedal..... "Oh" says the
guy... he thought VW brakes were cable actuated and that pulling the
handbrake made it easier for the pedal to work. His dad once told him that
all "OLD" cars had cable brakes....
We pull into my driveway at about 15 miles an hour, and he hauls up on
the e-brake - and sure as hell, the handle comes off in his hand. Good thing
we went through the garage door on the side that housed my brand new, two
week old 71 Boss 302 Cougar Eliminator.... If he had picked door #2, God
forbid, he might have damaged the only intact piece of sheet metal on a
totalled MGA that I was stripping. At least he had insurance. Yeah...he had
insurance like he had brakes. The Cougar only needed a new rear deck spoiler
- about $250 - and he was broke.
He offered the Beetle instead of me having to wait on a ten dollar a
payday plan. I redid the brakes, tarted it up a bit, and drove it for a
couple years. Hit a pothole one day, and the rear of my seat went through
the floor pan. There I was at 30 mph looking thru the sunroof, butt nearly
dragging on the ground, and I couldn't find the brake pedal. Pulled up on the
E brake and about a half second later stopped like an F-1 car.... I had run
smack into the thick rubber bumper on a city bus that must have just started
pulling away from a stop, because it kept on going..... I decided that twice
is charmed. Glued a sheet of plywood to the pan, remounted the seat and sold
that piece of....er, passed the legacy along....
They just don't make old cars like they used to.
Mark Childers
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