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Early Friday Funnies

To: healeys@autox.team.net, Awgertoo@aol.com
Subject: Early Friday Funnies
From: MBran89793@aol.com
Date: Thu, 2 Feb 2006 10:58:45 EST
Hi Gang- 
I could not wait until Friday to pass this one on to the  list. I thinks some 
of my lawyer friends will even get a laugh out of it too. By  the same token 
if you do not like "Lawyer Jokes" just hit your delete  button.
Marion

HUNTING IN UNKNOWN  TERRITORY

A lawyer went Duck hunting in rural North New  Hampshire. He shot and dropped 
a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field   on the other side of a fence. As 
the lawyer climbed over the fence, an   elderly farmer drove up on his tractor 
and asked him what he was  doing?
 
The lawyer responded, "I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and now  
I'm going to retrieve it."
 
The old farmer replied, "This is my property, and you are not 
coming  over here."

The indignant lawyer said, "I'm one of the best trial attorneys in  
California and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and  take 
everything you own."

The old farmer smiled and said,  "Apparently, you don't know how we 
settle disputes around here. We settle  small disagreements like this with 
the Northern New Hampshire Three Kick  Rule."
 
The lawyer asked, "What's that?"
 
The farmer replied, "Well, because the dispute occurs on my  land, 
first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times and  so on 
back and forth until someone gives up."

The attorney  quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided 
that he could  easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the  local 
custom.

The old farmer slowly climbed down from the  tractor and walked up 
to the attorney. His first kick planted the toe  of his heavy steel-toed 
work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped  him to his knees. His 
second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last  meal gushing from his 
mouth.  The barrister was on all fours when the  farmer's third kick to 
his rear end sent him face-first into a fresh  cow pie.
 
The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to  his 
feet.
 
Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Okay, you  old 
coot. Now it's my turn."


The old farmer smiled and said, "Naw, I give up. You can have  the 
duck."




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