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The ultimate deterrent - (semi LBC)

To: "Friends of Triumph" <fot@autox.team.net>,
Subject: The ultimate deterrent - (semi LBC)
From: "jonmac" <jonmac@ndirect.co.uk>
Date: Sun, 29 Aug 1999 01:47:19 +0100
O great computer people of these lists!

I recount an entirely true story which must perforce be
brief in the telling. Many years ago when I worked in
Europe, a colleague who was a Yorkshireman and a very good
friend, was greatly troubled by local drivers who drove
close behind him at night with headlights on main beam. He
tried many different techniques to stop this occuring - to
no avail, until ...
Being a highly practical person with his hands, owning and
driving a battered Land Rover and living in a rented farm
property, he found the ultimate solution. He obtained and
mounted two abandoned acetylene cylinders on the Landie's
roof and by undertaking certain modifications to the
cylinders, was able to fill them with very pungent and 5
star quality pig slurry. Two nozzles, controlled from the
steering wheel pointed backwards from the roof and the full
cyls were pressurised from the airline at his gas station.
The system worked superbly until some months later he
inadvertantly doused an unmarked police car that just
happened to have an open front window.
I now find myself in my friend's situation because I am
being DELUGED with spam telling me how I can make a fortune
while asleep, chain letters, credit assurances and a raft of
other bilge with tollfree phone numbers that won't accept
transatlantic calls from me. My ISP say they can't filter
out any more on my behalf and agrees its own servers are
getting jammed with this garbage. I've now reached the stage
that these jerk operations need a blast of cyberised pigs**t
themselves but I can't e-mail a reply to them. The message
bounces straight back as undeliverable. Thus, while it seems
they are at liberty to invade my privacy with their banal
messages, I can't respond. Pressing delete just isn't
enough - dammit I have to pay to receive this tripe whenever
I download and how do you structure I.E.4 to filter out
messages whose origins and senders you don't know in
advance?

Jonmac - wishing he was back in a Land Rover on the Parisian
Peripherique.


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