This is a multi-part message in MIME format.
--------------AE8FBCEE089521D28A17E30C
You've gotta have a seasonal chuckle out of this even though it
stereotypes us in another way..
Cheers for the season,
Mike
--------------AE8FBCEE089521D28A17E30C
Content-Disposition: inline
Return-Path: <bounce-joker-178164@send.memail.com>
Received: from edtnps03.telusplanet.net (edtnps03.telusplanet.net
[198.161.157.97])
by nfs1-1.bctel.ca (8.9.1a/8.9.1) with ESMTP id WAA27217
for <Michael_Gee@bc.sympatico.ca>; Mon, 13 Dec 1999 22:11:07 -0800 (PST)
Received: from send.memail.com ([206.196.80.81]:34589 "HELO send.memail.com")
by edtnps03.telusplanet.net with SMTP id <S245958AbPLNGFw>;
Mon, 13 Dec 1999 23:05:52 -0700
From: "Joke of the Day" <Joker@joker.org>
To: joker@joker.org
Subject: Gift Buying For Men - Joke of the Day
List-Unsubscribe: <mailto:leave-joker-178164F@send.memail.com>
Reply-To: "Joke of the Day" <Joker@joker.org>
Date: Mon, 13 Dec 1999 21:54:07 -0600
Message-Id:
<LYR178164-11771-1999.12.13-21.54.07--Michael_Gee#bc.sympatico.ca@send.memail.com>
Precedence: bulk
X-Mozilla-Status2: 00000000
The Original Joke of the Day http://www.joker.org
___________________________________________________________
Y O U R O W N I N T E R N E T R A D I O P R O G R A M S
Create your own free Internet radio programs with 35,000 streaming
MP3 songs at http://www.RadioMoi.com. RIAA approved site has pop
hits of yesterday and today, pop music, classical, jazz, rock, soul,
R&B, hip hop, everything from 1911 to 1999.
!!! You pick the tunes at http://www.RadioMoi.com !!!
___________________________________________________________
Ladies: Need help Gift Shopping for the man in your life?
-----------------------------------------------------------
Buying gifts for men is not nearly as complicated as it is for women.
Follow these rules and you should have no problems.
Rule #1:
When in doubt - buy him a cordless drill. It does not matter if he
already has one. I have a friend who owns 17 and he has yet to
complain. As a man, you can never have too many cordless drills.
No one knows why.
Rule #2:
If you cannot afford a cordless drill, buy him anything with the word
ratchet or socket in it. Men love saying those two words "Hey George,
can I borrow your ratchet?" "OK. By-the-way, are you through with
my 3/8-inch socket yet?" Again, no one knows why.
Rule #3:
If you are really, really broke, buy him anything for his car, a 99 cent
ice scraper, a small bottle of deicer or something to hang from his rear
view mirror. Men love gifts for their cars. No one knows why.
Rule #4:
Never buy men bathrobes. Once I was told that if God had wanted men to
wear bathrobes, he wouldn't have invented Jockey shorts.
Rule #5:
You can buy men new remote controls to replace the ones they have worn
out. If you have a lot of money buy your man a big-screen TV with
the little picture in the corner. Watch him go wild as he flips,
and flips, and flips.
Rule #6:
Do not buy any man industrial-sized canisters of after-shave or
deodorant. I'm told they do not stink - they are earthy.
Rule #7:
Buy men label makers. Almost as good as cordless drills. Within a
couple of weeks there will be labels absolutely everywhere. "Socks.
Shorts. Cups. saucers. Door. Lock. Sink." You get the idea.
No one knows why. (ABSOLUTELY TRUE!!)
Rule #8:
Never buy a man anything that says "some assembly required" on the box.
It will ruin his Special Day and he will always have parts left over.
No one knows why.
Rule #9:
Good places to shop for men include Northwest Iron Works, Parr Lumber,
Home Depot, John Deere, Valley RV Center, and Les Schwab Tire.
(NAPA Auto Parts and Sears Clearance Centers are also excellent men's
stores.) It doesn't matter if he doesn't know what it is.
("From NAPA Auto, eh? Must be something I need. Hey! Isn't this
a starter for a '68 Ford Fairlane? Wow! thanks.")
Rule #10:
Men enjoy danger. That's why they never cook - but they will barbecue.
(No one knows why) Get him a monster barbecue with a 100-pound propane
tank. Tell him the gas line leaks. "Oh the thrill! The challenge!
Who wants a hamburger?"
Rule #11:
Tickets to a Cowboys game are a smart gift. However, he will not
appreciate tickets to "A Retrospective of 19th Century Quilts."
Everyone knows why.
Rule #12:
Men love chain saws. Never, ever, buy a man you love a chain saw. If
you don't know why - please refer to Rule #7 and what happens when he
gets a label maker.
Rule #13:
It's hard to beat a really good wheelbarrow or an aluminum extension
ladder. Never buy a real man a stepladder. It must be an extension
ladder. No one knows why.
Rule #14:
Rope. Men love rope. It takes us back to our cowboy origins, or at
least The Boy Scouts. Nothing says love like a hundred feet of 3/8"
manila rope. No one knows why.
___________________________________________________________
BEST OF BREED has just been launched by WebSearch !!!
Tap into this POWERFUL NETWORK NOW for great SEARCH RESULTS !!!
WebSearch AU http://www.websearch.com.au/?enter=me
WebSearch NZ http://www.websearch.co.nz/?enter=me
WebSearch UK http://www.websearch.com.au/uk/?enter=me
________________________________________________________
MeMail.com: Delivering The Internet Your Way!
Joke of the Day
The Original Email Joke of the Day. Since 1994 we
have served more jokes than the leading hamburger
chain has served hamburgers. And we have been
responsible for half as many cardiac arrests!
mailto:subscribe-joker@send.memail.com
To UNSUBSCRIBE, forward this message to
leave-joker-178164F@send.memail.com
Other great publications at MeMail.com are FREE!
Entertainment
-------------
Joke of the Week mailto:subscribe-jokeoftheweek@send.memail.com
Daily Horoscopes mailto:subscribe-horoscopes@send.memail.com
Blast From the Past mailto:subscribe-blast@send.memail.com
Watercooler Stories mailto:subscribe-watercooler@send.memail.com
Jock Strip mailto:subscribe-jockstrip@send.memail.com
Entertainment Today mailto:subscribe-entertainment@send.memail.com
Living Today mailto:subscribe-living-today@send.memail.com
People mailto:subscribe-people@send.memail.com
Women's Words mailto:subscribe-women@send.memail.com
Music
-----
Today in Music History mailto:subscribe-music@send.memail.com
Country Music Mornings mailto:subscribe-countrymusic@send.memail.com
Rock Music News mailto:subscribe-rockmusic@send.memail.com
Health
------
Mind & Body Digest mailto:subscribe-mind-and-body@send.memail.com
Family Health Matters mailto:subscribe-familyhealth@send.memail.com
Health Tips mailto:subscribe-health-tips@send.memail.com
Heavy Science mailto:subscribe-science@send.memail.com
News and Opinion
----------------
Today's Consumer mailto:subscribe-consumer@send.memail.com
Environment News Service mailto:subscribe-environment@send.memail.com
Resident Alien mailto:subscribe-residentalien@send.memail.com
International News mailto:subscribe-guardian-world@send.memail.com
Media Beat mailto:subscribe-mediabeat@send.memail.com
Gizmo-rama mailto:subscribe-gizmo-rama@send.memail.com
Of Human Interest mailto:subscribe-human-interest@send.memail.com
Urban News mailto:subscribe-urban-news@send.memail.com
Business
--------
Cyberbriefs mailto:subscribe-cyberbriefs@send.memail.com
Marketing Tips Daily mailto:subscribe-marketing-tips@send.memail.com
Active Internet Marketing (A.I.M. Ezine)
mailto:subscribe-inet-mailer@send.memail.com
Advertise!
mailto:advertising@memail.com
This copy was delivered to: [Michael_Gee@bc.sympatico.ca]
Please send your jokes to: submit@joker.org
________________________________________________________
************
The Famous Joke of the Day One Liner!
We make a living by what we get, but we make a life
by what we give.
-Winston Churchill
--------------AE8FBCEE089521D28A17E30C--
|