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FW: [the-backroom] How to prepare for sailing season......

To: "'triumphs@autox.team.net'" <triumphs@autox.team.net>
Subject: FW: [the-backroom] How to prepare for sailing season......
From: "Paige, Dean" <DPaige@ci.santa-rosa.ca.us>
Date: Wed, 11 Jun 2003 08:48:49 -0700
Next to this Triumphs are easy!

Deano

> -----Original Message-----
> From: J&L Autoworks [mailto:jlautoworks@earthlink.net]
> Sent: Tuesday, May 27, 2003 1:58 PM
> To: The-backroom@yahoogroups.com
> Subject: [the-backroom] How to prepare for sailing season......
> 
> 
> How to prepare for sailing season ...
> 
> A preseason refresher course:
> 
> To best prepare yourself try these quick exercises:
> 
> 1. Buy a case of beer, sit with it in a very warm place for a few hours, 
> then drink it.
> 
> 2. Apply sunscreen to your face in streaks and sit in front of a sun lamp 
> for 2 hours.
> 
> 3. Sit on a bench with large metal fixtures cutting into your legs, stare 
> straight up into the sun for 2 hours - for a more robust workout: invite 4
> 
> friends to come over and yell at you the whole time.
> 
> 4. Go out and get very drunk, sleep 4 hours, then stand on a rocking chair
> 
> for 6 hours.
> 
> 5. Go to bank and withdraw $1,000 - then light it on fire.
> 
> 6. Sit in front of a commericial fan and have someone throw large buckets 
> of salt water on you
> 
> 7. Repeat number 6 in jeans and a sweatshirt AND/OR repeat number 6 with 
> head turned sideways to ensure water lodging fully into ear drum.
> 
> 8. Cut limb off off nearby tree, tie ropes to it, stand on rocking chair 
> with tree limb and ropes - hold them over your head for 3 hours... at 5 
> minute intervals drop on your head - more robust version: have friends
> yell 
> at you in 6 minute intervals.
> 
> 9. Set your wrist watch to 5-minute repeating counts... let it go off all 
> day long.
> 
> 10. Pour cold water in your lap and give yourself a wedgie, now alternate 
> between sitting and running around bent over.
> 
> 11. Tie ropes between 2 trees - push your body against them as hard as you
> 
> can for 6 consecutive hours - don't stop for pain or bruising.
> 
> 12. Place sandpaper on your stairs, crawl up and down on your knees for 
> several hours.
> 
> 13. Make 12 sandwiches on white bread with bad meat and cram them into a 
> bread bag - eat one a day for 12 consecutive days... make sure the last
> one 
> is peanut butter and jelly if preparing for Race Week.
> 
> 14. Tie ropes to rear bumper of friend's car, hold on tightly, but allow 
> rope to slip through fingers as car drives away - TIP: works best with 
> nylon fiber ropes, lengths in excess of 50'.
> 
> 15. Upon completion of previous 14 drills - sit down and drink 14 Mt Gay 
> rum drinks, any flavor.
> 
> 
> 
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