Dale Will wrote:
A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo, and when
the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that
are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a
whole, because the general speed and health of the whole keeps improving
by the regular culling of the weakest members.
In much the same way, the human brain can operate only as fast as the
slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, we all know, kills off
brain cells. Naturally, alcohol attacks the slowest and weakest brain
cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the
weaker cells, constantly making the brain a faster and more efficient
machine.
The results of this in-depth epidemiological study verifies and
validates the casual link between all-weekend parties and work
performance. It also explains why, after a few short years of leaving
university and getting married, most professionals cannot keep up with
the performance of the new graduates. Only those few that stick to the
strick regimen of voracious alcoholic consumption can maintain the
intellectual levels that they achieved during their university years.
So, this is a call to arms. As our country is losing its technological
edge, we should not shudder in our homes. Get back into the bars. Quaff
that pint! Your company and country need you to be at your peak, and you
shouldn't deny yourself the career that you could have. Be all that you
can be.
In much the same train of thought, common sense vs. the idiot seems to
be making more idiots these days. Before safety laws, only the idiot
would do that which everyone knew better not to do. Then came the idiot,
and did that thing. Then came the lawyers, and sued to protect idiots
from themselves. As more and more things were found to kill idiots, more
and more safety controls were put in place to protect these same idiots.
(The worse being the idiot/lawyer combination). Do we really need more
laws? NO! We need less idiots. And the only way to achieve this is to
stop protecting them. Once they reach the endangered species list, and
we see how much we have progressed, we can then understand what Darwin
really saw in his "Natural evolution of the species".
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