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Fwd: Redneck's = Answers ;-)

To: land-speed@autox.team.net
Subject: Fwd: Redneck's = Answers ;-)
From: Br69br69br@aol.com
Date: Mon, 5 Jun 2000 20:36:11 EDT
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 1. Calculate the smallest limb diameter on a persimmon tree that will
 support a 10 pound possum.

 Answer =   3/8" Dead  -  1/2" Live
 

 2. Which of the following cars will rust out the quickest when placed on
 blocks in your front yard?
 a) '66 Ford Fairlane
 b) '69 Chevrolet Chevelle        c) '64 Pontiac GTO

 Answer =    b. 69 Chevelle (Lighter Gauge Metal. From Detroit letting in 
them Bean
                  Counters)
 

 3. If your uncle builds a still that operates at a capacity of 20 gallons of
 shine per hour, how many car radiators are necessary to condense the
 product?

 Answer =  3 (from 1998 Crown Victoria's) The local Sheriffs was Mighty Upset.
 

 4. A pulpwood cutter has chain saw that operates at 2700 rpm. The density of
 the pine trees in a plot to be harvested is 470 per acre. The lot is 2.3
 acres in size. The average tree diameter is 14 inches. How many Budweiser
 Tall-Boys will it take to cut the trees?

 Answer = 1105 or 1 Per Tree + A Case to kill the pain from when I "Nick" 
Myself
                with the Chain Saw  (Sadly a true story).
 

 5. If every old refrigerator in the state vented a charge of R-12
 simultaneously, what would be the decrease in the ozone layer?
 
 Answer = What's an Ozone and how do you Lay em? Is it like Cinderblock?


 6. A front porch is constructed of 2x8 pine on 24-inch centers with a field
 rock foundation. The span is 8 feet and the porch length is 16 feet. The
 porch floor is 1 inch rough sawn pine. When the porch collapses, how many
 hound dogs will be killed?

 Answer = None,  I Breed Tough Hounds
 

 7. A man owns a house and 3.7 acres of land in a hollow with an average
 slope of 15%. The man has 5 children. Can each of the children place a
 mobile home on the man's land?

 Answer = Yes,  And a new Outhouse for each family. (A Two Seater of Course)
 

 8. A 2-ton pulpwood truck is overloaded and proceeding down a steep grade on
 a secondary road at 45 mph. The brakes fail. Given the average traffic load
 of secondary roads, how many people will swerve to avoid the truck before it
 crashes at the bottom of the mountain?
      For extra credit, how many of the vehicles that swerved will have
 mufflers and uncracked windshields?

 Answer = 2,   Extra Credit - None
 

 9. A Coal Mine operates a NFPA Class 1, Division 2  Hazardous Area. The mine
 employs 120 miners per shift. A gas warning is issued at the beginning of
 3rd shift. How many cartons of unfiltered Camels will be smoked during the
 shift?

 Answer = 10
 

 10. How many generations will it take before cattle develop two legs shorter
 than the others because of grazing along a mountainside? 

 Answer = None - To keep the meadow from being over eaten you switch them to 
               the other side of the mountain. This keeps them on balance.

 What Do I Win ?  

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Return-path: <Br69br69br@aol.com>
From: Br69br69br@aol.com
Full-name: Br69br69br
Message-ID: <e1.53f6bbb.266d9c8a@aol.com>
Date: Mon, 5 Jun 2000 20:15:06 EDT
Subject:  Redneck's  Answers
To: jr@pro-flo.com
MIME-Version: 1.0
X-Mailer: AOL 5.0 for Windows sub 81


--part2_3a.60c35c9.266d9c8a_boundary


 ANSWERS:
 1.   3/8" Dead  -  1/2" Live
 2.   b. 69 Chevelle (Lighter Gauge Metal. From Detroit letting in them Bean 
Counters)
 3.   3 (from 1998 Crown Victoria's) The local Sheriffs was Mighty Upset.
 4.   1105 or 1 Per Tree + A Case to kill the pain from when I "Nick" Myself 
with the
      Chain Saw  (Sadly a true story).
 5.   What's an Ozone and how do you Lay em? Is it like Cinderblock?
 6.   None,  I Breed Tough Hounds
 7.   Yes,  And a new Outhouse for each family. (A Two Seater of Course)
 8.   2,   Extra Credit - None
 9.   10
 10. None - To keep the meadow from being over eaten you switch them to the 
other
       side of the mountain. This keeps them on balance.
 
 What Do I Win ?   
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 Redneck Engineering Exam
 
 1. Calculate the smallest limb diameter on a persimmon tree that will
 support a 10 pound possum.
 
 2. Which of the following cars will rust out the quickest when placed on
 blocks in your front yard?
 a) '66 Ford Fairlane
 b) '69 Chevrolet Chevelle        c) '64 Pontiac GTO
 
 3. If your uncle builds a still that operates at a capacity of 20 gallons of
 shine per hour, how many car radiators are necessary to condense the
 product?
 
 4. A pulpwood cutter has chain saw that operates at 2700 rpm. The density of
 the pine trees in a plot to be harvested is 470 per acre. The lot is 2.3
 acres in size. The average tree diameter is 14 inches. How many Budweiser
 Tall-Boys will it take to cut the trees?
 
 5. If every old refrigerator in the state vented a charge of R-12
 simultaneously, what would be the decrease in the ozone layer?
 
 6. A front porch is constructed of 2x8 pine on 24-inch centers with a field
 rock foundation. The span is 8 feet and the porch length is 16 feet. The
 porch floor is 1 inch rough sawn pine. When the porch collapses, how many
 hound dogs will be killed?
 
 7. A man owns a house and 3.7 acres of land in a hollow with an average
 slope of 15%. The man has 5 children. Can each of the children place a
 mobile home on the man's land?
 
 8. A 2-ton pulpwood truck is overloaded and proceeding down a steep grade on
 a secondary road at 45 mph. The brakes fail. Given the average traffic load
 of secondary roads, how many people will swerve to avoid the truck before it
 crashes at the bottom of the mountain?
      For extra credit, how many of the vehicles that swerved will have
 mufflers and uncracked windshields?
 
 9. A Coal Mine operates a NFPA Class 1, Division 2  Hazardous Area. The mine
 employs 120 miners per shift. A gas warning is issued at the beginning of
 3rd shift. How many cartons of unfiltered Camels will be smoked during the
 shift?
 
 10. How many generations will it take before cattle develop two legs shorter
 than the others because of grazing along a mountainside? >>


--part2_3a.60c35c9.266d9c8a_boundary
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Return-path: <Br69br69br@aol.com>
From: Br69br69br@aol.com
Full-name: Br69br69br
Message-ID: <d0.6b89434.266d9a62@aol.com>
Date: Mon, 5 Jun 2000 20:05:54 EDT
Subject: Re: Redneck 's
To: PanhandleWillie@aol.com
MIME-Version: 1.0
X-Mailer: AOL 5.0 for Windows sub 81

landspeedracer@email.msn.com
ANSWERS:
1.   3/8" Dead  -  1/2" Live
2.   b. 69 Chevelle (Lighter Gauge Metal. From Detroit letting in them Bean 
Counters)
3.   3 (from 1998 Crown Victoria's) The local Sheriffs was Mighty Upset.
4.   1105 or 1 Per Tree + A Case to kill the pain from when I "Nick" Myself 
with the
     Chain Saw  (Sadly a true story).
5.   What's an Ozone and how do you Lay em? Is it like Cinderblock?
6.   None,  I Breed Tough Hounds
7.   Yes,  And a new Outhouse for each family. (A Two Seater of Course)
8.   2,   Extra Credit - None
9.   10
10. None - To keep the meadow from being over eaten you switch them to the 
other
      side of the mountain. This keeps them on balance.

What Do I Win ?   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Redneck Engineering Exam

1. Calculate the smallest limb diameter on a persimmon tree that will
support a 10 pound possum.

2. Which of the following cars will rust out the quickest when placed on
blocks in your front yard?
a) '66 Ford Fairlane
b) '69 Chevrolet Chevelle        c) '64 Pontiac GTO

3. If your uncle builds a still that operates at a capacity of 20 gallons of
shine per hour, how many car radiators are necessary to condense the
product?

4. A pulpwood cutter has chain saw that operates at 2700 rpm. The density of
the pine trees in a plot to be harvested is 470 per acre. The lot is 2.3
acres in size. The average tree diameter is 14 inches. How many Budweiser
Tall-Boys will it take to cut the trees?

5. If every old refrigerator in the state vented a charge of R-12
simultaneously, what would be the decrease in the ozone layer?

6. A front porch is constructed of 2x8 pine on 24-inch centers with a field
rock foundation. The span is 8 feet and the porch length is 16 feet. The
porch floor is 1 inch rough sawn pine. When the porch collapses, how many
hound dogs will be killed?

7. A man owns a house and 3.7 acres of land in a hollow with an average
slope of 15%. The man has 5 children. Can each of the children place a
mobile home on the man's land?

8. A 2-ton pulpwood truck is overloaded and proceeding down a steep grade on
a secondary road at 45 mph. The brakes fail. Given the average traffic load
of secondary roads, how many people will swerve to avoid the truck before it
crashes at the bottom of the mountain?
     For extra credit, how many of the vehicles that swerved will have
mufflers and uncracked windshields?

9. A Coal Mine operates a NFPA Class 1, Division 2  Hazardous Area. The mine
employs 120 miners per shift. A gas warning is issued at the beginning of
3rd shift. How many cartons of unfiltered Camels will be smoked during the
shift?

10. How many generations will it take before cattle develop two legs shorter
than the others because of grazing along a mountainside?

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--part1_3a.60c35c9.266da17b_boundary--

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