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Late Friday funnies

To: healeys@autox.team.net
Subject: Late Friday funnies
From: Awgertoo@aol.com
Date: Sat, 7 Jan 2006 09:09:22 EST
Enjoy--Michael:

Students were assigned to read 2 books, "Titanic" & "My Life" by Bill 
Clinton. One smart ass student turned in the following book report, with the 
proposition that they were nearly identical stories! His professor gave him an 
A+ for 
this report:

Titanic: $29.99
Clinton: $29.99

Titanic: Over 3 hours to read
Clinton: Over 3 hours to read

Titanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their
forbidden love, and
subsequent catastrophe.

Clinton: The story of Bill and Monica, their
forbidden love, and
subsequent catastrophe.

Titanic: Jack is a starving artist.
Clinton: Bill is a bullshit artist.

Titanic: In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.
Clinton: Ditto for Bill.

Titanic: During ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.
Clinton: Ditto for Monica.

Titanic: Jack teaches Rose to spit.
Clinton: Let's not go there.

Titanic: Rose gets to keep her jewelry.
Clinton: Monica's forced to return her gifts.

Titanic: Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life.
Clinton: Clinton doesn't remember jack #@&%.

Titanic: Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.
Clinton: Monica...let's not go there, either.

Titanic: Jack surrenders to an icy death.
Clinton: Bill goes home to Hilary...basically the same thing.
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From: PVAurochs@cs.com
Full-name: PV Aurochs
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Date: Sat, 7 Jan 2006 09:02:49 EST
Subject: Book Report
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Students were assigned to read 2 books, "Titanic" &
"My Life" by Bill Clinton. One smart ass student
turned in the following book report, with the
proposition that they were nearly identical stories!
His cool professor gave him an A+ for this report:

Titanic: $29.99
Clinton: $29.99



Titanic: Over 3 hours to read
Clinton: Over 3 hours to read



Titanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their
forbidden love, and
subsequent catastrophe.



Clinton: The story of Bill and Monica, their
forbidden love, and
subsequent catastrophe.



Titanic: Jack is a starving artist.
Clinton: Bill is a bullshit artist.



Titanic: In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.
Clinton: Ditto for Bill.



Titanic: During ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.
Clinton: Ditto for Monica.



Titanic: Jack teaches Rose to spit.
Clinton: Let's not go there.



Titanic: Rose gets to keep her jewelry.
Clinton: Monica's forced to return her gifts.



Titanic: Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her
life.
Clinton: Clinton doesn't remember jack #@&%.



Titanic: Rose goes down on a vessel full of
seamen.
Clinton: Monica...ooh, let's not go there, either.



Titanic: Jack surrenders to an icy death.
Clinton: Bill goes home to Hilary...basically the
same thing.




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