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Retained at Her Majesty's pleasure

To: <fot@autox.team.net>
Subject: Retained at Her Majesty's pleasure
From: "Paul Richardson" <Paul-Richardson@cyberware.co.uk>
Date: Sat, 3 Apr 1999 09:03:02 +0100
Oh Dear!

John's broken into the computer room at the prison again!!

It all happened three weeks ago the day after John had finished my new
website 
(http://www.cyberware.co.uk/~chips11). - His pet gerbil escaped early in
the morning and chewed through his modem wires. Incensed, and still in his
pajamas, he picked up the Herald radio aerial he pokes the fire with and
gave chase to the gerbil. After slashing the furniture in his lounge
thrusting and swiping at the gerbil, the chase went into his back yard,
where one of his thrusts with the aerial inadvertently punctured the front
tyre on his Reliant Robin. The chase finally ended outside the village
hall. John was in full flight chasing the gerbil when his pajama bottoms
fell down and he tripped  headlong into three women who were weeding the
front of the vicar's garden. After the ladies pulled his pajamas up and
tied them with binder twine he was put under civil arrest by the vicar and
charged with attempted assault on an un-armed gerbil, and making a
pleasurable nuisance of himself with ladies from the women's institute.

He's now serving three weeks community service based at Chipping Norton
prison. His duties centre on re-education in how to treat rare Triumph
spares with due respect and a course of pet management at the local animal
sanctuary.

Paul

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