Folks-
Compared to some of you, I'm just a beginner at bodging the odd mod, but I
have driven some truly dubious cars in my lifetime, and a good blend of
basic mechanical understanding and a creative attitude toward problem
solving has gotten me home a number of times.
One incident, chosen from many ....
Hundreds of miles from home, and many miles from the nearest paved road, my
1958 TR-3 sheared off the Woodruff key that made the right rear hub rotate
with the halfshaft.
Naturally, the car ground to a halt, all the power the engine produced
being used to grind up the inside of the hub with the conical end of the
half-shaft.
Now, normally you have to use a small nuclear device to separate the hub
from the shaft, but in this case the wheel and hub were just barely
speaking. Only the large nut on the end of the shaft kept the
wheel/hub/brake drum on the car at all.
Naturally, the nut was still tight. Very tight. Godzilla-at-the-factory
tight. I think the torque spec on that is something like 24 stone-leagues.
In any case, the only tool I had that would fit the nut was a plumber's pipe
wrench, and by standing on the wrench handle and using some of my more
colorful vocabulary I was able to remove the nut. The hub then fell off in
the dirt.
The interaction of the shaft and the hub had rendered the mating surfaces
pretty slick, and it was obvious that I couldn't replace the key, since the
keyways were filled with key remnants virtually welded in place.
Of course, I didn't have a Woodruff key, anyway.
What I did have was a hacksaw blade and a roll of electrician's tape, so I
broke the hacksaw blade into three pieces the length of the taper on the end
of the axle and taped them in place along the taper.
Meanwhile, since night was falling and along with it the temperature, my
girlfriend built a nice little campfire; she later confided that she
expected to spend the night beside it. I used the fire to heat the hub for
about half an hour, then used a large rock as a hammer to drive the hub onto
the axle.
Another session with the giant pipewrench and the hub seemed secure. It
didn't even wobble. I gingerly replaced the wheel, stowed the tools and
jack, kicked out the fire, fired up the car, and let out the clutch.
It got us back to Atlanta with narry a slip, and I drove it that way for
a year.
Other successful bodges ....
I drove for two years a Bugeye Sprite sold to me for $75 because the "clutch
was out." In fact, the clutch would not release, and I fixed it for a
penny. The penny served as a shim for the otherwise non-adjustable clutch
slave cylinder; I just put it between the metal piston and the release rod.
On the same car, the joint between the exhaust manifold and the exhaust
pipe leaked ferociously, but I quieted it down nicely with a handful of
Bondo. And I do mean a handful; I mixed it in my hand, then just reached
up under the carb heat shield and globbed it in place. It lasted about 3
months each time I did it.
The engine-driven fan on my current BMW disappeared late one night, exiting
the engine compartment at speed on the Interstate in south Georgia. It did
no damage on the way out, _mirable_dictu_, but left the engine in a rather
precarious cooling situation once we got to Florida and off the I-road. A
little re-work under the hood, however, connected the factory fog-light
wiring to the electric A/C helper fan, and, _voila_, a driver-controlled
electric radiator fan, complete with dashboard warning lamp. So what if the
"fan on" lamp says "fog lights."
-Shel
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