There is absolutely no autocross content here, but
given that this list (Evolution) has turned to tennis,
I figured this would be all right.
So, anyway, lots of people ask, "Katie, if you're not
into autocross like you used to be, just HOW do you
spend your time?"
The answer is very simple. I do stupid things. Last
weekend, March 8th, I completed the Way Too Cool 50k
in Cool, CA, just south of Auburn. This is 31 intense
miles of trail running.
I am including here selected photos of my run as they
appeared on brightroom.com. Why, I was even their
Cover Girl!
http://www.brightroom.com/view_event.asp?EVENTID=2363
To demonstrate that I am brave and courageous in more
ways than one, I shall include ALL FOUR of my photos
from this run, although they do not show me in the
most positive of light. I warn you now that many of
these photos are shocking. You might be surprised to
see that I am not as glamarous as the press makes me
out to be.
In this example, here is your friendly Ace Reporter
negotiating a downhill that to the common observer
might not look that steep, because it is, in fact, not
that steep. I turned my right ankle approximately 20
times, thanks to inheriting my dad's pronating feet. I
am blaming ALL of this on him. Notice how I have to
look at the ground to watch out for little rocks.
http://www.brightroom.com/view_user_photo.asp?EVENTID=2363&ID=3165929&FROM=photos&BIB=325
And in this photo, I am attempting to run down this
guy who by mile 21 had affectionately called me "the
gimp." I'd pass him on the flats and uphills, but he'd
get me on the downhills, always shouting, "Hey there,
gimp!"
http://www.brightroom.com/view_user_photo.asp?EVENTID=2363&ID=3166984&FROM=photos&BIB=325
This above photo does not capture my full sprint.
Although it looks like I am walking, I am most truly
not. I was catching up to my nemesis, the one who
called me the gimp, and I planned to overtake him by
the finish to show him once and for all. My heart rate
had reached 210. Obviously, as you can see, he did not
win without a fight. His girlfriend, who illegally
paced him in the last mile, was shouting, "Get him!
Kick his butt!" to ME, which was merely a
psychological ploy to egg him on to victory. Had she
remained silent, he never would have noticed my
attack. Bitch.
In this next photo, you see a woman scorned.
http://www.brightroom.com/view_user_photo.asp?EVENTID=2363&ID=3166985&FROM=photos&BIB=325
Notice my evil snear, my right hand in position to
claw out his eyes. Still, we exchanged warm post race
embraces. Why not let him believe we are friends?
I have two international distance triathlons coming up
in May and June. One is the infamous Escape from
Alcatraz. I did the swim part last year, and grew a
beard from the contaminated waters.
http://www.brightroom.com/view_user_photo.asp?EVENTID=1540&ID=1990111&FROM=photos&BIB=467
What the above photo does not show are my feet pointed
out at ninety degree angles.
-Katie Kelly
About the poster: Ms. Kelly used to autocross, like, a
total lot, and now she doesn't. She sends these posts
to autox related lists to illustrate what happens to
children of autocross when they try to grow up: they
jump out of airplanes and swim in the toxic San
Francisco Bay. Parents, consider yourself warned.
=====
Katie Kelly
Guilt slows your metabolism.
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