Some people will do pretty much anything to try and support their autocross
habit. Here's my story.
Thursday afternoon when I came home from work I found a note from my wife on
my computer monitor. Apparently she had heard on one of the local radio
stations that NBC was holding contestant tryouts for "The Weakest Link" at
the Metreon in San Francisco on Saturday. Now, I'm a big fan of the show,
and a master of trivia. Maria is always telling me I should get on one of
these shows (I'm also quite fond of "Jeopardy!").
I figured, what the heck? I could drive up to SF and try out and still get
back to Santa Clara that afternoon. I also was planning to attend a trade
show that day.
Yesterday morning I got up and drove out to San Francisco. It was still
fairly early so traffic was light. I made it to the Metreon at a little
after nine, but spent several minutes finding parking. (New insult
suggestion for Anne: "Who has fewer brain cells than San Francisco has
parking spaces?) I did eventually get my car parked.
At the front entrance of the Metreon was a sign giving directions to where
the tryouts were being held. I found where the line began, then went to
locate a bathroom. After drinking a pretty good-sized cup of coffee on the
way up, I really needed one.
I found what appeared to be the end of the line and just stood there. Then
someone asked me, "Are you lining up for tryouts?" I answered yes. He then
told me the end of the line was "somewhere back there," pointing around the
corner of the building. So I walked around to the back of the line.
And walked. And walked. And walked some more. The end of the line was
almost around to the front entrance! It was sort of like the DMV with a
stiff breeze.
While we were in line, one of the contestant coordinators was walking along
the line explaining the process to us. They would take us in groups of 125,
have everyone introduce themselves, then give us a quiz. Those who made it
through that would go to the next phase, which was a mock game.
Everyone was assigned a contestant number. Mine was 416. According to
Andrea, our coordinator, we would probably go in "around 2-ish." So I
decided I would drive down to Santa Clara and return for the tryout.
I spent a couple hours walking the trade show, handing out business cards,
explaining my business, entering door prize drawings... then it was time to
drive back to SF. This time the drive took longer, Traffic was pretty
heavy as I got further up the Peninsula. As I watched the time get closer
to 2:00, I began to worry.
By the time I got my car parked, it was 2:05. I ran from my parking space
to the front of the line. It turned out they were running a bit behind
schedule, and they would be taking contestants 376-500 at 2:30. Great, I
thought, now I can relax a little. I walked over to Starbucks and got a
frappuccino.
As it turned out, we didn't actually go in until a little after three. We
all had to fill out an application first. The first question on the app was
to determine whether we worked with either NBC or the production company, or
were related to, or were friends with. Some of you might have seen a news
article recently where a winner on the show turned out to be the ex-wife of
one of the producers.
Another question was: have you appeared on any game show within the last
year, or have you been on three game shows in the last five years? It
turned out one of our hopefuls had been on "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"
and his show had aired in April! He argued vociferously that he should
still be able to try out for "The Weakest Link" because he never actually
made it into the hot seat. But the coordinators said no, he was ineligible,
but he could stay and take the quiz anyway.
The application also asked about my job, my interests, some interesting
and/or unusual facts about myself. Naturally I put down something about
autocrossing. I also made it a point to mention that my wife has short red
hair and wears glasses (can't hurt to suck up to the host, y'know ;).
Then came the quiz. I at least had an idea on nearly every question, but
there was one that stumped me. What "M" is a name for a store specializing
in women's hats? I had absolutely no idea and answered "Macy's."
After they collected our quizzes, Andrea told us they would bring us back in
about ten minutes to let us know who made the first cut. Ten minutes
actually wound up being half an hour. Finally they called us back in and
they announced who made the cut. They began calling off contestant numbers.
They didn't call them in numerical order, however. I wonder if this might
have been on purpose. After all, "The Weakest Link" isn't a friendly show.
But as it turned out, I was among those who made it.
For the next step we were given name tags. We were then brought into a room
set up for a mock game. Another contestant coordinator (whose name I can't
remember) gave us instructions. We would begin by telling a little about
ourselves, but this time we had a video camera. We were to look at the
camera while speaking, which was made a bit difficult by the bright light
behind it. Part of this exercise was to make the show's producers take an
interest in us; if we got their attention, we'd probably make the show.
All right, team, let's play "The Weakest Link"! The coordinator cycled
through the panel twice, asking each of us questions. Beforehand, she
recommended to us never to answer "I don't know" as "that doesn't give Anne
much to work with. If you don't know, try a humorous answer." One of the
contestants got the following question: "In music, which member of the band
Oingo Boingo also composed the theme for 'The Simpsons'?" Her answer: Jon
Bon Jovi. Wonder if that would work?
So, anyway, after all that, I still don't know if I'll be on the show or
not. All I know is that if I don't get a call from the producers within the
next six months, I did NOT make it. But I'll let you know if I do get on.
So keep watching. I don't want the show being cancelled before I get a
chance to be a contestant.
G'bye!
Scot
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